They say it’s the season of love, but I know some of y’all aren’t coupled or feeling the love. I’ll go back to saying what I always write and say … Nurturing the relationship you have with yourself and learning to love yourself first is the key to having healthy, fulfilling relationships in every aspect of your life. This is especially true when talking about romantic relationships.
Take a look at this video, and let me know in the comments if you found anything helpful in it. I even sing a little bit in this one. Just know that you are deeply loved, and I think you are magnificent, wonderful and lovable! Show some of that beautiful love you have to give to yourself this love season … Especially if you have no one in your life to give that love to right now. It will happen. Just keep the faith.
Senée Seale is a book author, mental health professional and life guide passionate about helping people create positive changes in their lives. Are you ready to start attracting positive things into your life through practicing daily affirmations? Get your free copy of The Princess Guide to Gratitude Affirmations. If you’d like to book a personal session with Senée, she’s accepting new clients.
I’ve been saying all year, “Loving You in 2022.” If you’re familiar with any of my work, then you know how important I believe healthy self-love is … So much so that I wrote an entire book about it (The Princess Guide to Loving Yourself First). Today, we’re talking about authenticity and uniqueness. We are all unique. Once we truly grasp how special that is, and love ourselves for it (quirks and all), that is where the true magic happens. Take a look at the video to hear all about it.
Senée Seale is a book author, mental health professional and life guide passionate about helping people create positive changes in their lives. Are you ready to start attracting positive things into your life through practicing daily affirmations? Get your free copy of The Princess Guide to Gratitude Affirmations. If you’d like to book a personal session with Senée, she’s accepting new clients.
It’s Thankful Thursday once again, and today we’re talking about unconditional love. I may not have said it in this video, but let me be clear here … If you’re living and breathing, then you deserve to be loved — first and foremost by yourself, then by others. If you choose to participate in negative behaviors that are unacceptable to others, then that is your choice to continue in those behaviors and their choice to set healthy boundaries not allow you into their lives. However, you can begin to show unconditional love to yourself first — I’m not talking about excusing negative, destructive behavior nor enabling it. What I’m suggesting here is that you love yourself unconditionally through the process of changing such behaviors.
The love of others is important. I know I talk a lot about loving yourself first, being independent, standing alone and going to the kingdom within for the answers. All of these things are good. What I don’t think I’ve made very clear in my work is that we were not created to go through life alone. Like they say, “No man is an island.” I believe we came here to love and be loved. Psychological research shows that we need human interaction — not through a screen but being physically together in the same room with others. We all need help at different points on our journeys. There’s nothing wrong with that at all. It is through these times of giving and receiving love and kindness that we feel fully alive and human.
So, check out the video for today’s gratitude practice … In case I haven’t told you lately, I’m so grateful for you! Every like, new follower, comment, email … I pray for each and every one of you that you will experience real love, joy, peace, health, blessings and prosperity! I mean that from the bottom of my heart. It’s going to be fabulous for you in 2022!
Senée Seale is a book author, mental health professional and life guide passionate about helping people create positive changes in their lives. Are you ready to start attracting positive things into your life through practicing daily affirmations? Get your free copy of The Princess Guide to Gratitude Affirmations. If you’d like to book a personal session with Senée, she’s accepting new clients.
Since we just celebrated National Coffee Day (Sept. 29) and International Coffee Day (Oct. 1) a few days ago, I thought it was appropriate to talk about one of my favorite things … Drinking coffee. Now, this subject may seem vastly different and totally unrelated to self-love and finding beauty in the moment, but take a look at the video, and I’ll explain. Also, watch to the end because I include an exercise to help you find the beauty in each moment — no matter what you’re doing.
Senée Seale is a book author, mental health professional and life guide passionate about helping people create positive changes in their lives. Are you ready to start attracting positive things into your life through practicing daily affirmations? Get your free copy of The Princes Guide to Gratitude Affirmations. If you’d like to book a personal session with Senée, she’s accepting new clients.
It’s Self Love Sunday. So, grab your favorite beverage, and let’s talk about self-worth … what it is, what the research says about it and how to increase it.
Senée Seale is a book author, mental health professional and life guide passionate about helping people create positive changes in their lives. Are you ready to start attracting positive things into your life through practicing daily affirmations? Get your free copy of The Princes Guide to Gratitude Affirmations. If you’d like to book a personal session with Senée, she’s accepting new clients.
Grab your favorite beverage and join me as we talk about ways to love yourself like no one else. Self-love really is an inside job. No one can give it to you, but no one can also take it away. Check out the exercise in this episode, and comment below to tell me how it worked for you. It isn’t a one-time thing, but with practice and time, this exercise will strengthen your confidence and self-love.
Senée Seale is a book author, mental health professional and life guide passionate about helping people create positive changes in their lives and relationships. Are you ready to start attracting positive things into your life through practicing daily affirmations? Get your free copy of The Princes Guide to Gratitude Affirmations. If you’d like to schedule a personal session with Senée, she’s accepting new clients.
On this Self Love Sunday episode, we’re talking all about what self-love is and what it is not. Watch to the end because I have a special exercise for you to do! I want to know what you’re learning about self-love and how you are implementing these things into your life. So, leave a comment here!
Senée Seale is a book author, mental health professional and life guide passionate about helping people create positive changes in their lives. Are you ready to start attracting positive things into your life through practicing daily affirmations? Get your free copy of The Princes Guide to Gratitude Affirmations. If you’d like to schedule a personal session with Senée, she’s accepting new clients.
How easy is it for you to answer the question, “Who are you?” We’re in my kitchen today chatting about life. I’ll take you through a short exercise to discover if you have any areas you may want to work on. So, grab a cup of tea (or the beverage of your choice), click the video and let’s talk about self-worth and who you really are.
Senée Seale is a book author, mental health professional and life guide passionate about helping people create positive changes in their lives. Are you ready to start attracting positive things into your life through practicing daily affirmations? Get your free copy of The Princes Guide to Gratitude Affirmations. If you’d like to work directly with Senée, she’s accepting new clients.
It’s amazing to me how other people think they have the right to tell you who you are or what your strengths and talents are. It’s one thing when you’re a child and can’t see your value, but it’s quite another when you’re a grown adult and someone tries to rip at the core of your being. Having an outside perspective is good, but you should know and love yourself well enough to know the truth about you.
It’s happened to me many times over the years, but recently, people have gotten bolder. I like to think that I’m self-aware enough to know when something is being pointed out to me that I need to work on. I’m more than willing to do that — and have been doing that intensely for the last several years. However, I have spent a lot of time alone in the past year with the lockdown and a freak Texas snowstorm that made us all shelter in place. I’ve become very clear on who I am, what I am worth and my core value.
When someone attacks what I know to be true about myself, it feels like what I imagine being stabbed in the heart or shot in the chest feels like. I try to handle it with grace and class (staying on my throne with my crown on not allowing myself to give them what they deserve — off with their heads or thrown in the dungeon), but it hurts, nonetheless. The circle of people who I allow in my life was already small, but it’s gotten smaller in the last couple of years because I cannot allow negative people to pollute the growth and abundance in my life. You have to do the same.
With the clarity of my essence has also come a clear discernment … My spiritual and intuitive abilities have become off-the-charts accurate. I can see people’s motives behind their words and smiling faces. It makes me sad, actually. So many people today are so busy trying to pull others down to make themselves feel better that they don’t see the negative energy they are operating in. It really makes me sad when I see this happening to people like me who are just minding their own business, trying to help people and function in the high-vibrational energy of love. My granny used to say, “Them that are ignorant, let them be ignorant still.” Translation from Texan: Let stupid people be stupid, and get far, far away from them.
Signs of a hater
Many times, these types of people are just Basic Broads/Boys (someone who used to be close to me had another name for them, but we’ll stick with this one). They are envious of anyone who radiates the internal beauty that only comes from doing the intense, internal work that most people are not willing to do themselves. They often display the clinical features of Histrionic Personality Disorder described in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition to include, “[Someone who] is uncomfortable in situations in which he or she is not the center of attention; consistently uses appearance to draw attention to self; shows self-dramatization, theatrically, and exaggerated expression of emotion [drama queen/king]; and is suggestible (i.e., easily influenced by others or circumstances) [people who rush to do the latest trendy thing].”
The other type of person who would treat people this way are the opportunists who are looking to scam others for their own gain. When their strongarming and bullying doesn’t work, they start attacking a person’s character and core being. They often display the features of Antisocial Personality Disorder such as, “little or no remorse for causing pain to others, [and a] consistent pattern of blaming others for what happens to him/her,” according to The Complete Adult Psychotherapy Treatment Planner.
Valuable people protect themselves
Both of these are psychological disorders that need professional help. Often, however, it goes untreated because these people don’t think they are the problem. As described above, some of them blame everyone else instead of looking inside for the answers. Unfortunately, the only things you can do are to distance yourself from these types of people, keep your intentions pure and only allow them around you if or when they are ready to get help to change themselves.
“While you may decide to help someone else change, you can only do so ‘when the student is ready,’” wrote Dr. Wayne Dyer in Real Magic. “You cannot make someone else ready, but you can take responsibility for your readiness … Be ready to give what is necessary, do it with active intention and then let go of the outcome. Your actions will flow from this intention and you will find yourself much more at peace with your relationships, however they work out in the physical world.”
Let me be clear — separating yourself from toxic people isn’t you being selfish or “wrong.” Why do you think there is a wall, guard stations and moat around a castle (when it isn’t on its very own island)? These things are there as protection because the people who live inside — you, the royal person of high standards — have great worth and value. I’ve been hearing unrelated people saying lately that a robber doesn’t target an empty house. They look for value inside. If you have value inside of you (regardless of your material possessions), it is your right and duty to protect yourself, your heart, your energy and your emotions. When people show you who they are, believe them, as it if often said.
“I will send love, but I will remove myself physically from their presence because I am too divine and significant to be the subject of any abuse,” wrote Dr. Dyer. “I will teach them with my behavior, not my words, that I am not willing to be their victim any longer, beginning now … I will not send judgment toward them and their choice to be self-destructive, but the most loving thing I can do is to no longer reinforce their addictive behavior. I will be letting them know that I am no longer in bondage to them, and I am going to be leading my own life on purpose, rather than being an emotional slave to their conduct.” He wrote these affirmations about people in dysfunctional relationships with substance users, but they can be applied to any type of toxic relationship.
Valuable people have pure intentions
You are the only person who gets to determine your worth — after you have done the internal work to make sure you are living authentically with pure motives — and you are the creator of your world. “To recapture that childhood magic and become your own miracle worker, you will have to change the thoughts that created your world of limits and boundaries,” Dr. Dyer wrote. “That takes place in your mind first, and since thoughts originate with you, you have the ability to recreate your own image of what your life is going to be from now on.”
There’s a reason people wear a crown … It’s to protect the mind — the creative space in the body where our reality is manifested. “As a man thinks in his heart, so is he,” Proverbs 23:7.
Most of the time, you have to create your reality in solitude and seclusion — unless you’re blessed with a divine partner who truly believes in and supports you, or you have people in your life who truly love you unconditionally. That is rare today. So, be prepared to either put yourself on lockdown or be Clark Kent during the day and Superman at night when you’re alone. Whatever you do, protect your dreams, visions and plans for the future. Know yourself deeply and love yourself first so that you will not be shaken or defined by others.
Senée Seale is a book author, mental health professional and life guide passionate about helping people create positive changes in their lives and relationships. Are you ready to start attracting positive things into your life through practicing daily affirmations? Get your free copy of The Princes Guide to Gratitude Affirmations. If you’d like to work directly with Senée, she’s accepting new clients.
February and December can be two of the hardest months if you’re single. It seems like everyone around you and everyone on social media is being celebrated and loved. I dated a couple of guys who disappeared around Thanksgiving and didn’t reappear until the flowers began blooming. Make no mistake — They disappeared so they wouldn’t have to do anything for me during Christmas and Valentines. It made me feel terrible and less than important. I began making one of the qualifying questions to get a date with me, “Do you celebrate holidays and look for ways to make it special for the woman you’re dating?” Being in a long-term relationship with someone who chooses not to do things for you can make you feel even worse.
When studying Marriage & Family Therapy in graduate school, I learned that women who are highly educated and professionals have a higher rate of divorce. My instructor said it has something to do with women having more choices today with increased income. (Previous generations got married to have an income.) While being married appears to be the goal for many women, some find that staying married is a lot more work than anyone will tell you about.
I may sound like a broken record, but I will say once again that loving yourself and practicing loving actions toward yourself will not only help you cultivate healthy self-esteem that no one can take away from you, but it will also give you the skills you need to love others when the right relationship comes into your life.
How do you really love yourself, especially when you’ve been rejected, or you’ve been told through other people’s words or actions that you are not lovable? How can you put self-love into practice? Let me say that being all alone when you begin the process is the perfect time and atmosphere to focus on yourself without the judgment or distractions of others. I highly encourage it, if you have that option. Relationship expert Dr. Margaret Paul gave The Huffington Post these suggestions for learning to love yourself:
Listen within to your own feelings. Many people easily tune into others’ feelings yet have no idea what they feel. If you ignore a child’s feelings, that child will feel unloved. Ignoring your own feelings has the same result — your inner child feels rejected, abandoned and unloved by you.
Be compassionate with your feelings. If you judge your feelings, telling yourself you are wrong for having them, your inner child will feel rejected and abandoned by you. If you are kind, gentle, tender, understanding, and accepting of your feelings, your inner child will feel loved by you.
Be open to learning about what your feelings are telling you. Just as an actual child feels loved when you are compassionately interested in why he or she is hurting, your inner child will feel loved when you explore what your feelings are telling you … Compassionately attending to your feelings, learning what they are telling you and then taking action to remedy the situation, will make you feel loved.
Create a solid connection with a spiritual source of love, wisdom, and comfort. Love is not a feeling we generate from our mind. It comes from the heart when our heart is open to our source of love. When you open to learning with your higher power about loving yourself and others, love flows into your heart, and you feel loved.
Choose to be around loving people. We don’t always have a choice — such as in work relationships — but when we do have a choice — such as in personal relationships — choosing to be around caring, supportive and accepting people will make you feel loved. If, when you have a choice, you consistently engage with unkind, judgmental or abusive people, the message you are sending to yourself is that you are not worth loving.
Take loving actions for yourself around others. When you are around someone who is being unkind, speak up for yourself letting the person know that you don’t like being treated that way, and then either be open to learning about what is going on, or lovingly disengage from the interaction. Allowing others to treat you badly sends a message to your inner child that he or she is not worth loving.
Take care of your body, your time, your space and your finances. You will feel loved and lovable when you feed yourself healthy food, and get exercise and sleep. When you ignore your health, you are giving yourself the message that you are not worth loving. When you respect your own and others’ time and space, you are letting yourself know that you are worth it. When you overspend, putting yourself in unnecessary debt, you are not taking loving care of yourself, and your inner child will feel scared, alone, and unloved. Just as an actual child needs to feel safe regarding the necessities of life, your inner child needs to feel the same way.
Find work you love. Since work takes up a big part of your day, finding or creating work that fulfils you is vitally important. If you continue to force yourself to stay at jobs you hate, the message to yourself is that you are not worth doing whatever it is you need to do to create a fulfilling work life.
Create balance. We need balance in our life to feel loved and lovable. We need time to work and time to rest and rejuvenate. We also need time to nurture our body and soul through activities that bring us joy.
Learning to love yourself isn’t easy. If it were, we would all be pros at it — and therapists would be out of jobs. However, I’m living proof that it’s possible. Taking it day-by-day and practicing these principles intentionally will eventually (over several weeks and months) will make it automatic in your thinking and behavior.
Senée Seale is a book author, mental health professional and life guide passionate about helping people create positive changes in their lives and relationships. Are you ready to start attracting positive things into your life through practicing daily affirmations? Get your free copy of The Princes Guide to Gratitude Affirmations. If you’d like to work directly with Senée, she’s accepting new clients.